Who Could Resist?

Short post today. I’ve been reading a lot, so that cut down on my blogging, such as it is.
Really, my only reason for posting today is because I have tried to keep up with Post a Week 2011, and I think maybe I missed a week in there. Plus, I got tired of seeing people type “First” whenever they are the first to post on a blog item or Facebook update or something many people will read.

The update came from the Blue Jays on Facebook, and someone’s “First” made me mentally cringe. I decided not to bother holding back and wrote: “First? First to what? First to type “First.”? First to expose yourself as a superstitious follower of a trend no one could understand or explain as being worthy of the time it took to partake, or a narcissistic ploy for praise from all the Interwebz who will undoubtedly be jealous of your impressive ability to correctly type the letters f,i,r,s,t, and a period? Or are you referring to someone standing on first base that we should be aware of? I don’t see anyone on first, but maybe you do. So who’s on first?! I don’t know. THIRD BASE!”

Really, who could resist?
(Maybe Who could…..)

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Disentangled Deliverance

I heard it
hushed
rushed
like when the phone is dying
and I knew who
but I ignored it
just like you
earlier
afraid I would hear
I knew then, too
and I can’t look at you
not right after
for fear
I knew you’d see
my face gives me away
so if you don’t look at me
you’ll never see my pain
and we can carry on this way
because you chose it
how’d I have no say?
well, that’s the way of it
and every single day
I wait
and every single day
I cringe
I crawl
a little ball I am
and I try to ignore the fact
that I’m in love
and that I want to cry
and that I want to hit you
for hurting me
for not telling
for not thinking about it
just because you’re happy
doesn’t make it okay
for the rest of us
I want to collapse in your arms
and cry until my heart feels again
it isn’t easy keeping it cold
it isn’t easy being numb
but I know how you feel
and it would take just a minute
to realize
that there must be a problem
if you aren’t sure of love
you aren’t in love
it’s as simple as that
time won’t help you decide
trust me, I know, I tried
love isn’t comfort and trust
love isn’t passion and lust
love isn’t measured in time
and I know, love isn’t just
love is not wanting to leave
love is a mental reprieve
loving should not be a crime
for lovers are far too naïve
but the story here, far too sad
is in parallel
and I’ve played the role before
from a different seat
but it was just as bad
I can’t help you see
how you would have so much more
with one less
without you asking me
and even still
it seems so contrary
you probably wouldn’t
even believe me

but I’ve watched you
when you weren’t looking
and I don’t see a man in love
I don’t even see a man confused about love
I see a man confused and saddened
by the loss of a first
that was really good sometimes
and really hard
though that’s easier now to forget
since she’s allowing it
though she’s not aware
just how much you’re testing it
I’m the only other one
who knows what’s going on
and my heart is breaking for you
for me
watching your guilt
take a life of its own
and the longer you wait
the more it’ll have grown
when you finally decide
to tell her the truth

it’s selfish what you’re doing
I don’t want to sound mean
but you’re aware that you’re hurting
and destroying self-esteem
and you know what your instincts
are telling you to do
so if you won’t do this for me, or for her, babe
do this for you

       

       

Copyright L.M. 2008.

Day 10

😯

  I didn’t go on the beach today.  I know!  Very sad.  However, in my defense, it was pretty cool here today.  As in, 10 degrees Celsius, and *very* windy.  People here were wearing touques, no word of a lie.  We were watching, amused, as a construction worker who was in charge of guiding traffic was trying to arrange his touque under his hardhat.  We had a good few minutes waiting to watch the hilarity.  It really was quite chilly though, especially considering two days before, I was getting a sunburn.

  In the morning, I went for a brunch crêpe at Julio’s, and chatted with him for a bit.  You Are Always On My Mind, sung by Elvis was playing, and Julio sang a little as he prepared.  So entertaining 🙂 The crêpe was delicious of course……

  We went shopping today and I bought a few little things.  After, we went to Crabby Bill’s for my second crabs’ legs meal, and it was even better than the first….. actually quite a bit better.  The original location is still my fave.  On the drive back we saw quite a few of the rich rich people’s houses/mansions with their backyards on the beach facing the water…… it’s rumoured Tom Cruise had a home in that area, so we always joke about going to see if he’s still got his Christmas lights up.

  Somehow those seemingly few activities took up our entire day.  Tonight we might be off to play some pool, but we’ll see.  I have to get working on my applications so we might be tied up doing that instead.  Anyway, have a good night folks!

Day 4

  Today we went golfing!  I didn’t do so badly, but had a couple rotten holes and ended with a 43….. still not a bad score if it mattered to me  haha   😉

  What was neat though were the little bonuses on the course: there was a roseate spoonbill hangin out on Hole 6, a tree with a large, active bees’ nest, and that tree itself was neat because it had some sort of hanging tubers that had lumps that appeared to open into a flower….. very very strange.  Wow!  Just out of curiosity (and not expecting such a quick result), I did a quick search for “tropical tree”, went to the first site, and guessed at a name that might fit — sausage tree.  http://mgonline.com/Sausage_Tree.html  Would you believe it?  I think it may have actually been that kind of tree!  Ahh, the internet is a wonderful thing.

  After golfing, we went to our friends’ place for a pizza lunch.  Very tasty, very fun.  I had a tickle in my throat that I couldn’t get rid of though, so I was going nuts trying not to cough every two seconds.  A couple funny jokes were told, let me see if I can remember any.

  Two men got up to the gates of Heaven and were addressed by Saint Peter.  Saint Peter asked the first man, dressed in a leather jacket, shades, and slicked back hair, “…..and who are you?”  The man replied, “I’m Derek Smith, and I’ve been a pilot for 31 years.”  Saint Peter looks at his list, exclaims, “Ah!  There you are,” and gives him a golden staff, a silk robe, and lets him through the gates.  The second man walks up to Saint Peter and is also asked who he is, to which he replies, “I’m John Brown, and I’ve been a priest for 31 years.”  Saint Peter consults his list, exclaims, “Ah!  There you are,” and gives him a wooden staff, and a cotton robe.  The man pauses a moment, then asks, “Why, Saint Peter, I can’t help but notice a discrepancy here….. that man was a pilot and got a golden staff and a silk robe, while I was a priest and only got a wooden staff and a cotton robe!”  Saint Peter replies, “Ah, yes.  Well, here in Heaven, we go by results.  You were a priest, and have made people fall asleep for 31 years, but he was a pilot and made people pray!”

hee hee.    🙂

Harbour

if you ask me I will tell
the story of my chance
sentences strung as one
beautiful words taking turns
to paint the scene
of immortal love

if you ask me I won’t hide
won’t push the thoughts aside
you’ve always been light
ever since the first
and I sense till the end
oh to be there, with love

if you ask me I will say
truth to you, one
do you know I’ve been there?
just ask and I will say
like a stem grows each day
to hold its beauty high in the air

yes, love, I’ve been there
I have seen what I should not
and I didn’t want to return
but you — yes, you frighten
I could swear on my life
you take my breath away

love, have you been there?
I want to change your mind
I want to show it could be
love, I beg you to tell me
someday you’ll join me there

      

        

Finished: 6:18 a.m., Tuesday, November 20th, 2007. (adjustments 6:26 a.m. to final verse, same day; further adjustments 6:32 a.m., again to the final verse, again the same day).
Copyright L.M. 2007. (see note on next poem. perhaps exaggeration, emphasis on feeling, not necessarily definition).