Starting Over Dark

I’m not sure where I got the idea
but it’s stayed with me throughout the years
“along with men of blue
come leagues of hurt for you”

I thought I knew what was going on
that destiny just needed help
but I ignored or forgot
my only natural thought

anything deep is dark
anything true is sharp
so now I’m starting over
starting over with you

it’s funny when life takes a turn
when you’re craving to go straight
the darkest eyes have called me
so shall I go to you?

anything deep is dark
anything real is sharp
starting over
starting over with you

give me a moment
until I know I’m alright…..

anything deep is dark
but not all pain is sharp
starting over
I’m starting over with you
starting over
I’m starting over with you

         

         

Copyright L.M. 2008.

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What Will Never Break

maybe I’m just greedy
I’m taking too long
maybe I am happy
and just didn’t know
maybe I’m not lying
I’m just waiting for the truth

tear it apart
you think that you can
tear it open
again and again
tear it apart
but it never will
break

maybe sleeping’d be good
I’d rather not know
maybe it’s something I should
try on my own
some night for a change
one horn won’t find me truth

tear it apart
you think that you can
tear it open
again and again
tear it apart
but it will never
break
no, it won’t ever break

pyraminds, waterfalls
katydids, overalls
pictures of the truth…..

tear it apart
you think that you can
tear it open
again and again
tear it apart
but it will never
break
no, it won’t ever break

        

        

Copyright L.M. 2008.  (written March 4th, 2008.).

Promenade

still enamored by a dream
a silly, softened, stitchless seam
a carbonated, senseless laugh
an embarrassingly shameless gaffe
the one dynamic sits unpaid
the one fear leaves me unafraid
the single most endearing act
and priceless crime must you attract
a signal-laden field of mines
a fork with fused and broken tines
a walk down new and foreign lanes
or through solemn, bleak champaigns
decisions made, though left unclear
still run the ship straight through the pier
but dreamers dream a softer flight
when they flee, giggling in the night
down streets that brilliantly shine
so luminous and so devine
and so the portion gently laid
my point, I daresay, has been made

       

         

Copyright L.M. 2008.  (written March 3rd, 2008.).

Black Knight Window

the window to you
somewhere near closed
has been rattling
rattling all morning

I cannot afford
to shut it tight and
to heed your most
careless warning

I can see through you

give me a doorway
at least I could enter
and with a new pathway I
could see that I went there
but bodies aren’t minds
in that they never lie
did you think of me before you
spoke your mind tonight?

come back and hold me
I feel awful tonight

before you know it
we’re best friends, you said
as if the thought of us
never came to your head
oh, the parallels were painful
but you didn’t even see
how that undesired result
exactly fit me

I feel awful tonight
I need you to hold me

      

       

Copyright L.M. 2008.  (written March 3rd, 2008.).

Count On It

don’t speak to me tonight
I almost left without you
but something drew me back again

a wise friend once said
“in the end, we can always handle
more than we think we can”

and I’m counting on that

if friendship lasts forever
through times we are together
then I don’t know

if lovers breathe as one
and you like me alone
then I don’t know

that I can count on that

well there’s sacrifice and attraction
and there’s feeling and reaction
then there’s more
when there’s relevance I’ll matter
when you know what you’re after
I’d give you nothing, nothing
but it’s always more
more

confusion takes a seat
as hearts skip a beat
and I’m tired of the season

but somewhere along the way
sometime before I go away
I’ll finally find the reason

I’d better count on that

well there’s high-speed collision
and difference in vision
and then there’s more
don’t you know that reaction
‘s still a form of attraction
no less, no more
I count on that
I give you nothing, nothing
but it’s always more
more
you can count on that

      

         

Copyright L.M. 2008.  (written March 3rd, 2008.).

Until You Let Go

I walk the hunted path
with familiar steps ahead
maybe by morning
I’ll have seen the street
but I’ll never know

I run only when needed
and this makes you laugh
and somehow,
somehow
you make me wonder
but I’ll never know
and that’s alright

because you came to me
you came to me
needing nothing
seeing everything
being everything
you won’t know how
and you won’t know
how you fall
until you let go

I think maybe you’ll hurt
before you come back
but you know you can trust
and so you’ll come back
and that’s alright

because you came to me
you came to me
needing nothing
seeing everything
being everything
you won’t know how
and you won’t know
how you fall
until you let go
and that’s alright
trust me
let go

      

       

Copyright L.M. 2008.  (written March 1st, 2008.).

Permanent Reminder

have you ever broken stride?
it seems you felt it all
but with each new breath
you know you were wrong

how can you know love?
if all you’ve tried is lust,
comfort, and misguided trust
then you hit a wall
no surprise at all

I don’t wanna be around
when you find her
I don’t wanna bring you down from your cloud
I don’t need a permanent
reminder
of all the good things I’m not allowed

well, I, I’ve seen the painful death
I’ve witnessed, and been there too
I know how hard it is to see
the same thing when it’s happening to you

but if there’s some doubt, like you say
if love is even there
well if you’re not even sure,
then what you doing with her?
I really think you should prepare

and when honesty is key
and you’re more honest with me…..

I don’t wanna be around
when you find her
I don’t wanna bring you down from your cloud
I don’t need a permanent
reminder
of all the good things I’m not allowed

I don’t wanna be around
when you find her
I don’t wanna be the foolish clown
I don’t need a permanent
reminder
of how I’d never let you down
you know I’d never let you down

     

      

Copyright L.M. 2008.  (written February 27th, 2008.).

Black and Bright

it’s not too late
got lots of time
new lines stemming from my eyes
white on black and black on white
everything’s gray
everything’s gray
tonight

leave it alone
leave it alone
leave it alone

I start again
a brand new day this time
singing words of peace and joy
I’ll start again
open your eyes
open your eyes

leave it alone
leave it alone

I put it off
but I cannot dance tonight
I’ll sing of love
even if it isn’t right
I’ll put it off
lacing up my shoes
this isn’t like you
this is not like you
this is not like you
this isn’t you

black and bright this time
black and white this time
black and right this time
black and white is fine
black and white

black and right this time
black and white is mine
black and white mind
black and light
black is right
black is mine
blackened mind
black as night
black and bright makes
black and white and
black and white makes
everything gray

everything’s gray
everything’s gray

    

       

Lyrics Copyright L.M. 2008; Music Copyright M.K. & L.M. 2008.  Finished: February 2nd, 2008.

Disentangled Deliverance

I heard it
hushed
rushed
like when the phone is dying
and I knew who
but I ignored it
just like you
earlier
afraid I would hear
I knew then, too
and I can’t look at you
not right after
for fear
I knew you’d see
my face gives me away
so if you don’t look at me
you’ll never see my pain
and we can carry on this way
because you chose it
how’d I have no say?
well, that’s the way of it
and every single day
I wait
and every single day
I cringe
I crawl
a little ball I am
and I try to ignore the fact
that I’m in love
and that I want to cry
and that I want to hit you
for hurting me
for not telling
for not thinking about it
just because you’re happy
doesn’t make it okay
for the rest of us
I want to collapse in your arms
and cry until my heart feels again
it isn’t easy keeping it cold
it isn’t easy being numb
but I know how you feel
and it would take just a minute
to realize
that there must be a problem
if you aren’t sure of love
you aren’t in love
it’s as simple as that
time won’t help you decide
trust me, I know, I tried
love isn’t comfort and trust
love isn’t passion and lust
love isn’t measured in time
and I know, love isn’t just
love is not wanting to leave
love is a mental reprieve
loving should not be a crime
for lovers are far too naïve
but the story here, far too sad
is in parallel
and I’ve played the role before
from a different seat
but it was just as bad
I can’t help you see
how you would have so much more
with one less
without you asking me
and even still
it seems so contrary
you probably wouldn’t
even believe me

but I’ve watched you
when you weren’t looking
and I don’t see a man in love
I don’t even see a man confused about love
I see a man confused and saddened
by the loss of a first
that was really good sometimes
and really hard
though that’s easier now to forget
since she’s allowing it
though she’s not aware
just how much you’re testing it
I’m the only other one
who knows what’s going on
and my heart is breaking for you
for me
watching your guilt
take a life of its own
and the longer you wait
the more it’ll have grown
when you finally decide
to tell her the truth

it’s selfish what you’re doing
I don’t want to sound mean
but you’re aware that you’re hurting
and destroying self-esteem
and you know what your instincts
are telling you to do
so if you won’t do this for me, or for her, babe
do this for you

       

       

Copyright L.M. 2008.

Le Départ/The Departure (April 2007)

Le Départ

il ne prend pas beaucoup
assis sur le bord d’un rien
la valeur me dit
“ne t’inquiètes pas
il en reste assez”
mais je sais déjà
je sais

je n’étais ni le tout
ni la seule
alors je suis

avant le départ du jour
je vois du monde
assis sur mon bord
mais il n’en reste plus
et j’entends
un soupir éternel qui me dit
c’est encore assez
oui, ça je sais

The Departure

it doesn’t take much
sitting on the edge of a nothing
worth tells me
“don’t worry
there is still enough”
but I know already
I know

I was neither the all
nor the only
and so I am

before the passing of the day
I see people
sitting on my ledge
but nothing remains
and I hear
an eternal sigh that tells me
it is still enough
yes, that I know

Copyright L.M. 2oo7.